Adrienne's Wedding

49/84

I am on day 49 until Adrienne's wedding and 84 days until the race. I have stuck with my diet and have lost 3.4 pounds as of yesterday. I think the fact that I have had some wine here and there is the factor slowing my progress down and I have to eliminate that. I know that the diet is not exactly what I will do for life but for the next 49 days it is the way of life for me. I can handle it for this time frame too. I just have to stay focused and continue training... 3.4 pounds in the first 10 days isn't bad at all. It is progress. Now that my body is accustomed to the low carbohydrate intake, working out should not be as taxing.

I believe in order to make the progress I want to; I need to do 1hour of cardio training daily. For now I am striving to at least run a mile a day but with the goal of increasing my endurance so that by race day I can run continuously for the entire 1/2 marathon. So build up to running the entire hour and then on Saturdays just keep adding more time to it. On the other days stick with the hour just work on how many miles you can do in that time frame.

The more weight I lose the less trauma my  body will feel from running. You don't see many people on the track my size trying to run... NO

I know I can do this and I really am thrilled that I have finally figured out a method I can stick with. Do a count down with the promise that you can evaluate at that time what you want to do from there. I am going to be okay. I will run the St Jude's marathon and I will get my dang medal.

Bennett is Three!

So time flies. Here we are Labor Day weekend and I am getting around to my blog. In my defense typing on our home computer is really frustrating ever since the boys took all the keys off. I was able to get most back on but typing with some are very difficult. Oh well. I am proud of Bennett's transformers cake. I broke a sweat trying to get it just right for him. He was happy. Since then if you ask Bennett how he is doing he simply raises his hands and shows you that he is three!
Cullen's first soccer game will be next weekend and for the next 12 weeks or so you will find us at the soccer fields every Saturday morning. He has no clue what is going on and we are enjoying watching him have fun with his new friends.
My work is crazy busy right now from the time I get there to the second I sign off I am on a call talking. This is very exhausting having no breaks and I am hoping things will calm down sooner than later. 10 of us have been picked to do a new pilot call group @ work. I will be cross-trained to take all incoming calls and we will be sort of the hub to help equalize all the different areas and keep the level of productivity at an even kill. My one hope is that this prepares me for future promotions. Any position in my department above me will want someone who has experience in all the call areas... this makes me very knowledgeable on all the different types of policies and that is a good thing for becoming a team leader and one day a manager. Dare to dream!
Matt is still one of the many not being able to find a job currently. He has a few good possibilities currently and hopefully soon someone will offer him a position. I am ready for a double income lifestyle where we can take a breather from the bills.
Life is really good for the most part and I am starting to look at things differently. Like in the next 5 years regardless of Matt's job situation we will be way better off with my income and our bills. Our home will have that insurance thing drop off in 2 1/2 years. My car will be paid off around that time too. I will be making more money at work yearly just by doing what I am doing now. Between the car loan and that insurance you have to have for the first 5 years of owning a home until you have 20% vested in it... that will be almost $600 a month less we will have to pay right there! Other bills and loans will be gone by then as well. So if we can just keep on trucking time is simply going to take care of some of my current stress!
I will say that I seriously doubt you will be able to get me out of this home until we are able to put at least 20% down on our next home... and I really don't want to move until the boys are in high school or so. This house fits us will plenty of room for growing if we need it.
So I am thankful this morning because I know now that all we need is time to get to a better place in life and I have faith God will be with us the whole way. My faith in God and mathematics says it is a no brainer.

Soccer Mom Me

Ok. Seriously proud mom here with nothing to say but how much did my heart swell watching my son tonight during the soccer evaluation session. SO PROUD! He was proud too and after each drill he would crane his head looking for us and once found give us the biggest smile ever. I would walk through fire to give me son this kind of happiness. Cannot wait to see how training goes and then the actual games! I just want my baby to build confidence and feel positive about teamwork... that is really the bottom line is learning how to work with others and have pride and fun doing so. : ) Go CULLEN!

Strange Dream

Ok. So right before I woke up this morning I had an odd dream. I was on a plane going to an unknown location and the flight attendants were advertising that they did wedding receptions right there on the plane... I guess for destination weddings... unknown really. Anyway they had a table set up with all sort of neat foods, Hawaiian based it appeared, and were serving the guests. Turns out a wedding was taking place or was going to be taking place but many guests did not show up... at this point I think we were now in a reception hall place at a hotel or something. People were eating and mingling when the flight attendants mentioned that it cost $27.50 for a plate and we were all going to be charged. I think they had croissants, fruit tray, some sort of ham, etc. Everyone freaks out because we thought it was free or being paid by the groom and bride that was to be but many is no more... That is when all the food started going bad. Someone yelled that there were maggots in her food and another started to throw up. I was sipping coffee and started noticing that the cream had turned all lumpy in my cup. Bleck. And then I woke up.

I have no idea what that meant and why I would dream it but I will say that I checked the milk before putting it in my coffee this morning!

Vacation 2010

Gulf Shores, Alabama June 14th 2010

The brown sand is the oil. We weren't able to get into the water but we did enjoy being able to be there and played in the pool. Trips with your children are fairly exhausting and wonderful just the same. Cullen was way more comfortable in the water this time around and Bennett kept on being Mr. Cool floating around with his floaters on. Cullen discovered swimming with his head under the water and really started to excel. We got him some goggles that he loved too. I hope we are able to take the boys swimming every weekend in local pools so they stay comfortable in the water. One day I hope we have our own pool... dare to dream!

Fabulous Weekend Ahead!

I love long weekends. I have hopes to get some projects around the house done and do a bunch of family outings. Today we are heading to the McWane Center with my parents coming along. I really want them to see how much the boys enjoy it there. Mom and Dad gave us a year membership and it has been awesome. My parents live in the same town just down the road a bit. We still don't see them all that often. My parents are people with serious schedules. Mom is a teacher and has a million commitments and Daddy is a preacher with a church to tend to and he is also very involved in a children outreach program here in Alabaster. Needless to say they don't just pop in from time to time. At times it can hurt my feelings when I compare it to the way Matt's parents are always wanting to see the boys and keep them. Then I have to remember that my parents are very independent people and really just unique. They are also more on the side on introverted than extroverted so I don't get daily/weekly/monthly calls from them checking in with me. If I want to talk with them I have to call them. This is just who they are but at times in my life it has hurt my feelings. Not much you can do about it though. I have chosen to live close to them for this reason and I take my family to Daddy's church as well so that the boys are able to spend time regularly with them.

Monday I am having some friends over for a cookout and am really thrilled about it. Time to get as much hanging out with the gals and their guys before many  of them move off to various places, mostly in Texas. What I have learned from them is that friends are important and you need to put yourself out there to make friendships even if you feel insecure. You know you need to push yourself sometimes in order to get what you want in life. These gals are beautiful smart women with such drive! I am so proud to call them friends and now that many are moving off I am just going to have to open up an account to put money in for the Bookies Adventures.

Sigh. It is storming outside and after two cups of coffee I am feeling the urge to curl up in bed once more. Bennett is on the couch watching Dinosaur Train while Cullen and Matt are still sleeping. Well after a morning at the McWane Center and then lunch I am sure the boys will be ready for a good nap and maybe I will be able to indulge in one with them. They have started a Sunday School class at Shiloh for the children and Matt and I are going to try to teach it I think.We have our two sons in it and it will help us become involved more. I want us to linked in and belong. I think we will go ahead and join the church sometime soon. I wonder what will happen once Daddy really does retire but I don't know when that will happen and if we find that once he leaves the church has lost its appeal well we will start looking elsewhere. For now it is a great church for us to go to where we feel welcome and not judged. That is important to me as we struggle these days to find our footing.

I am so lucky in so many areas. I have two beautiful boys who are smart and fun and just as sweet as can be. I have a husband that I have been with for 10 years now. I have a home that is really growing on me and it fits our family's needs perfectly. We found a church family to belong to and Cullen has settled in to his school, Bright Horizons. I have great friends and a good family. My job is fairly secure for now and the only thing I expect to happen is for me to start moving upward within the company. I am smart and hard working and that counts for something where I work. I have my 2 cute shih tzus and will probably allow them to start breeding this next year as well. If we make a profit off the sell of their puppies we will go ahead and buy another one. Just a small time breeding thing that maybe if Matt cannot find a job he can manage this and that can supplement our income with some other odds and ins. My hope is Matt goes back to school and finds something he is good at and gets a degree in and can enjoy working for the rest of his working years. If I had the time or money I would go back to school and get my law degree. I always wanted it but wanted a family first. Well now I have the family and all I want is to be able to support them without worry. I think I might study up on the LSAT and just take it and then just apply to Cumberland and see what happens. The worst case scenario is that I am not accepted and if that happens well I can finally scratch that off my daydream list.

Biggest daydream currently you might ask... To find a check for a million dollars in my mailbox from some sympathetic relative who is loaded (I don't have this relative but in a daydream does it really matter?) Do you know what I would do? I would simply pay off all our debt including our home. Make all necessary repairs to our home and cars and then put the remaining balance in an annuity. I would continue working and simply enjoy life within our means and never know debt again. That is my dream and even without a benevolent benefactor I am going to work hard to where that is the life I have. Tawanda.