Funerals and Babies

I am at a loss. Matt's grandmother passed away this weekend and tonight is the visitation. I hate visitations. I feel it is so disrespectful to socialize around the body of your loved one. When I die and leave this Earth I really hope people respect my wishes about my funeral and visitation. There will be no viewing of my dead body ravaged by age and maybe disease. No way Jose. What I want is a lovely picture of me in my prime displayed and yes people may gather and laugh and long lost relatives may reunite because of my death. So be it. The difference is that my dead body will not be in the room on display.
I do not want my boys to go to the visitation becuase I feel they are too young to be there. They knew Memaw but are not mourning her passing. They are too young and were not that close to her. The boys being there would be for the comfort of others and I am simply not comfortable with that. This is a two and a half hour visitation. Anything that length of time is simply TOO long for children their age. I would not take them to a church service that long either. I also do not want them to see Memaw like that. Let me be clear. She is not in her body any longer and I do not want my babies to associate what is left behind as her. She is in Heaven with God and her loved ones.
Apparently I am not going to be able to protect my boys from this. Whether I want them to attend is out of my hands. My husband's family are basically demanding they attend and my husband will not say no to them. That is that. I am being bullied at the expense of my children's innocence. I know my opinions are strong on this subject but that is the point. I feel strongly about this and hate the idea of subjecting my children to something I totally do not believe in. I do not want them to be traumatized and it is not like saying,"I told you so" to Matt will make it all better after the fact. If this was one of their grandparents or someone they were close to then I would want them to go if they wanted to in order to help them have closure and go through the mourning process. This is not the case in this situation. Once again I am being strong armed and if I stand my ground I will be the bad selfish daughter in law and wife.
My last hurt over this all and yes this is about my feelings on all of it and I am not currently in the mood to be open to how others feel... Matt agreed with me that it was not appropriate for our boys, 3 and 2 years old, to go tonight. Then once his mother says her opinion on the matter Matt throws me under the bus stating this is my idea alone and he is simply trying to placate me. Grr. He was in full agreement and did not want them to go and yet he could not or would not tell that to his mother. It is me and me alone. Rudeness. I loved Matt's grandmother and I mourn the loss of her all the while happy that she is finally where she wanted to be. She was so ready to leave this world it feel wrong to be really sad about it all. If I made a stink it stinks up the wrong thing. I want to honor Mrs Harris today for the great life she had. Therefor I really have no choice in this but if my babies are hurt by going I will never forgive them for it. There you have it, Taylor Morrison at her best.

Miss Daisy Belle Morrison

This is our little gal who we will be getting in March. Miss Daisy is just as gorgeous as can be! Look at her arched brows and long eye lashes! I think that is what attracted me to this breed first, their eyes. Then their personalities hooked me for life! Fun fun fun.

I've decided to just live my life as I see fit and not worry what others think of me. I guess that is my present from Father Time... I just realize that we have the one life on Earth and I want to live it to the fullest! So I am going to be a hobby breeder and I am going to have more children. There I said it. I want a house full of children and laughter. I know that my husband is out of work and I know that we are just getting by for now but the key is this is just how life is today. Nothing ever stays the same so we just have to enjoy and plan for our future babies with excitement for when the time is right. God provides!

Matt and I have so many plans for our home here in Alabaster and we have committed to living in this house until the boys are in high school. We know the things we are doing around the house will only add so much value for resale but will make our life here so much better! So we are doing it for us while we live here and know that we probably won't see it in the resell. We have re-organized our playroom in to a family room with an area for watching tv with the boys, the doggie room w/ a doggie door to our fenced in yard, and our office. That way we all can be in the same area doing our own things. The divider to the doggie area is not completed and we still want to pull up all the carpet and then do some sort of stain on the concrete... I think that will be a cool look and then we can do area rugs around the office and tv area to help divide the space. Easy clean and low in cost works for us! That way in a few years if we want to upgrade this area we can without issue of covering up the flooring. The doggie wall is easily removed too so if we ever want to change it up it will not leave any permanent marks to the area. The doggie room has a gate that keeps the dogs in and the boys out when needed. It is a great amount of space for the dogs so that they have room to play in doors and go outside when they want. : ) It was my concept and Matt made it happen for me. I still have painting to do in here. For now I've only pulled up the carpet in the doggie area. Matt has his scrap wood leaning against the wall for now too but at least it is back to being a livable space once more!

The next big project is closing in the loft and converting it to the boys bedroom. They are so thrilled to get to finally sleep in their bunkbeds. And then it is time to tackle some fun projects in the kitchen. We are going to just have fun and make this home "just so."